Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Naptime = my time?

I've already spent months waiting for le Petit to become more independent, and then when he does, I almost regret the little itty bitty baby he was before he took the leap. Almost.

It used to be he'd only sleep during the day in my arms or, more rarely, in the stroller and it drove me absolutely bonkers. Well, today for the first time at naptime he fell asleep in his crib all by himself. Grandma was babysitting and, having exhausted all the tricks she knew to get him to stop crying, placed him in bed and he fell asleep almost immediately.

So I'm at home now with a sleeping baby in the other room and this odd sense of guilty freedom.

Nothing else to do but blog, I guess. (I'm telling myself housework would be too noisy and might wake him up. Yeah, that's it.)

I'm feeling guilty because I've been in a rotten mood all day. I really don't do well with lack of sleep, yet I've been staying up way past my bedtime to wring the most "me" time out of the hours after le Petit has gone to bed. I went to bed at half-past midnight last night but laid awake worrying about Christmas presents I haven't yet found, of all things, until one fifteen. Just when I'd almost lost consciousness, le Petit woke up hungry, so I didn't get to sleep until two.

I need to promise myself -- not to mention le Petit and my husband, who suffer from my lack of sleep almost as much as I do -- not to do this anymore.

1 comment:

Squidly said...

I still nap with Saffi as my "me" time is after she falls asleep at night. I usually stay up at least two hours, reading and catching-up with emails. She still wakes up once to nurse but we co-sleep so it isn't really an issue.

I really sympathize with all I've had time to read in your blog so far. I had a very long, exhausting labor that took months to fully recover from. Becoming a mom has been a complete transformation though I cannot (and don't want to) imagine my life without Saffron, though of course I at times feel starved for alone time and time with Kneil. He unfortunately is busy studying for the CPA exam which makes things harder on us but that should all be over by the summer. Don't feel guilty if "Le Petite" is happy sleeping while you do other things. He'll be fine as long as you are there when he wakes.